OK, here is my burnt toast for the day: I long for home. I don’t know what “home” means to you, but for me it is wrapped up in a lovely, peaceful feeling. Home is reading a good book under a cozy blanket on the sofa while the hushed sound of golf is on TV. Home is standing on the beach at Corona del Mar as my feet slowly sink into the sand with each wave that rushes over them. Home is familiarity, comfort and ease of life.
Maybe you are catching on to why I have issues with life not ending up how I want it to turn out. I seem to want everything to be diametrically different than the world- by it’s very nature- is capable of producing. I don’t want to live with uncertainty. I don’t want to deal with my problems… or my children’s problems… or the world’s problems. You see, I don’t want there to be any problems.
I just want my blankie and an old movie, for pete’s sake!!!
There is a sign in my kitchen with the jaunty little quip, “Home is where your mom is”. I bought that sign when I felt farther from home than I ever had before. It reminds me that even when the Pacific Ocean is almost 2000 miles away, my children are still right at home. It is my job to make their home be everything for them that my heart longs to find for myself. They need to feel safe, they need to feel loved, and they need to know that no matter what happens outside those doors, they can always run right back here and everything will be okay.
The funny thing is, that when I do that for them, I find myself feeling right at home, too. Even without sinking feet.
gosh carrie…way to make me cry on a tuesday night. now i want my mom!
Also…do NOT under any circumstance listen to "Home" by Michael Buble. You will cry. Hard.
Well, now I HAVE to listen to that song, Amelia!!!!