I named this blog “burnt toast” because I am an idealistic dreamer who has found choosing to embrace the un-idealistic world to be a blessing.
For me, actual burnt toast has always represented motherhood, in particular. I have many memories of my mom eating the least appealing piece of toast in the batch. I never thought I would be able to be that kind of mom, but I was wrong. I love to give the best to my family, even if that means I get the worst. It gives me joy, truly.
Lately, though, my definition of figurative burnt test is broadening.
I keep praying for and reading about holy fire. There are lots of places in the Bible where fire comes from heaven. God uses fire to in 2 Chronicles after Solomon finished building the temple.
Solomon prays this:
“Now arise, O LORD God, and come to your resting place, you and the ark of your might. May your priests, O LORD God, be clothed with salvation, may your saints rejoice in your goodness. O LORD God, do not reject your anointed one. Remember the great love promised to David your servant.”
Then fire comes from heaven and burns up the sacrifices on the altar. God’s glory fills the temple. The people cry out, “He is good; his love endures forever.”
Holy fire burns up the offerings of the faithful to prove God’s love.
I am left wondering: Is this how God rests in the temple?
In Luke 9, Jesus talks about resting:
“As they were walking along the road, a man said to him, ‘I will follow you wherever you go.’
Jesus replied, ‘Foxes have holes and birds of the air have nests, but the Son of Man has no place to lay his head.'”
Jesus said that before the Resurrection. Now, since we are His temple, is it possible He could rest in us?
I want Jesus to find a resting place in me.
I am not as grand as Solomon’s temple. I am a small human on a tiny planet in a vast universe. But I am His very own beloved child. And His love endures forever.
So I put it on the altar. My best and worst I offer to God. My talent. My words. My love for others. My good (sometimes unappreciated) advice. My failed attempts at friendship. My glorious moments as a mother. Every scrap of life I have is His.
I would rather give it all to Him and be His resting place. I don’t want to make myself more comfortable in God’s world. I don’t want God to simply use me. I don’t just want God to hear me and answer me.
I want my life to be a place He can rest. What an honor it would be to have the Creator of all things resting with me! The Savior who loved me more than His own comfort finding comfort- in my prayer, my love, my devotion. This is my hope for my life.
Burnt toast represents everything that has ever seemed more important than that hope. If it was more important, I am happy to see it burnt on God’s altar. Because once it is, I can be left full of the glory of God. So full that everyone who sees my life will say,
“He is good; His love endures forever.”
All for Him.