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Walking through the warm and dark night, I listened to a sermon about the Ascension.  It is the moment Jesus rose to heaven so He could fulfill His purpose, set the captives free, and sit at God’s right hand.

This miraculous moment should fill my heart with everlasting joy.  But all I can do is cry because Jesus went away.

I know it’s necessary.  I know it’s best.  But with a heavy week behind me and a long day coming tomorrow, the longing for God right here with me is overwhelming.

There is a lot of talk in Christian circles about how we weren’t meant to live in this fallen world.  We were exiled from Eden and sent here, to a place that is not quite home. I understand that.  I live that.  I feel that.

But we can’t let ourselves be confused about God’s purposes being perfect.  We are meant to be here in this world at this time in God’s plan.  We can’t let our longing for heaven distract us from His plans for Earth and for us.

Life can feel like brief glimpses of joy strung out between excruciating disappointments, less than perfect moments, and times of immense griefs.  But when I open my Bible and let Jesus speak into my heart, He never fails to shine into my darkness.  He is here, inside me.  


Longing for hope, I crack open words written by someone who lived in the midst of more suffering than I could imagine:
“God proves to be good to the man who passionately waits, 
   to the woman who diligently seeks.
It’s a good thing to quietly hope, 
   quietly hope for help from God.
It’s a good thing when you’re young 
   to stick it out through the hard times.


 When life is heavy and hard to take, 
   go off by yourself. Enter the silence.
Bow in prayer. Don’t ask questions: 
   Wait for hope to appear.
Don’t run from trouble. Take it full-face. 
   The “worst” is never the worst.


 Why? Because the Master won’t ever 
   walk out and fail to return.
If he works severely, he also works tenderly. 
   His stockpiles of loyal love are immense.
He takes no pleasure in making life hard…”
-Lamentations 3:25-33 (the Message)
Someday, I will see Jesus face to face.  But right now I walk through life heart to heart with Him.  I walk and I cry quietly in the silence of today’s weariness, knowing that my diligence and trust is growing into a faith so great that I can rest in its branches even in the scariest of storms.

Stormy skies or sunny days, I can say securely that God is with me; all because of the day Jesus left.

I guess I do have more everlasting joy than I realized.

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